July 13, 2015
It’s been awhile since I last wrote. I had two deaths in the family. A first cousin on my maternal grandfather’s side and a another on my maternal grandmother’s….on the same day! It was a sad occasion, but one thing I loved about it, spending time with family and that is a moment you cannot buy.
I’m at a point in my life where I feel a bit of a mid-life crisis coming on. I never thought that I would go thru it. It’s not something I wanted to face in the first place, but there it is…..
I’m also a bit of a late bloomer in life. I’m 41, with no husband or kids yet. I suppose that’s another story to tell. At this time of my life, I’m not happy. I’ve struggled with this for a good few years. There’s a lot of things I want to do, maybe too many. I’m not happy with my job, in fact, I hate it….straight hate it! I’m thankful to at least be doing something for eight hours, but it’s not what I want. I feel like a damn zombie, just mindlessly coming and going. I’m at odds with what steps to take, even though I know what step I do need to take!
Then there is my creative brain, which never sleeps. I want to get back to drawing, illustrating….this is where I’m the most happiest. I’m in juggling two blogs, including this one, which makes three, then I’m starting on an art project called “What Beautiful Is” and then another graphic novel project. That is a lot to juggle, but I don’t mind doing it. It keeps me busy.
I know what I want and what I want to do. I just need to do it. It’s funny, when we’re kids we cannot wait to be adults, but once we are….we want to get back being the care free kids with no 99 problems!
There are times when I feel like I missed out in life. At one point I wanted to try modeling, but I ended up getting cold feet, although I think I can still take a crack at it.
I do see life as chapters. Your childhood, teen years, 20’s, 30’s and so on. For me I’m starting on my 40’s chapter and I see it with great promise, late or not.
featured image courtesy of www.hdwallpapersinn.com